The beginning of something beautiful

There are a lot of blessings that come with motherhood, and one of the most precious of these is watching your children love each other. 

From the first time I introduced Caleb to his baby sister, I yearned for them to connect deeply. Even before Hadley was out of the womb, I hoped and daydreamed about how Caleb might want to snuggle with his sister and try to protect her. I expected him to be intently fascinated with our delicate baby girl, wanting to hold her and kiss her the way I've seen so many other "big" siblings do. 

However, Caleb wasn't too interested in my prelaid plans. He mostly just wanted to go about life like normal, doing his little boy thing. He'd give her a glance here and there, but didn't pay the new member of our family much mind. Don't get me wrong; he was a good brother. He loved her and wanted to make sure we had her with us when we went somewhere. But, he wasn't quite infatuated with her like some older brothers tend to be. 

With Reid's arrival though, I got a bit more of that sibling lovin' that I'd longed for. Hadley just couldn't get enough kisses from this new little person in our house.  

Often we have had to keep her from climbing right on top of him as she tries to give Reid all the big sister affection she can. 

It isn't unusual for her to want to give him a pacifier, a blanket, or even a toy to play with. That said, we've had to watch her a bit more closely with Reid than we ever had to watch Caleb. The other day when we were loading the car at my mom's, we actually caught her putting her toes in Reid's mouth as he happily sucked on them while she giggled. (I'm so thankful we'd just given her a bath!)

While it may be extra work to keep an eye out for her type of lovin', I can't get enough of these tender gestures and am so grateful for the opportunity to watch Hadley care for him even being just a babe herself.

Even though Reid is getting bigger and catching up to his sister in size (they are only about 6-7 lbs different in weight), we still have to remind Hadley to be gentle. She hasn't quite grasped the concept that he's a baby. Though he looks like a bruiser, he's still pretty delicate like all babies.

I walked out of the room for a second while Reid was sitting on the floor playing with his toys. When I came back, I found that Hadley had quick as a flash disassembled the couch and was including Reid in the couch cushion fun....You can see why I can't turn my back!

Most of the time, she's pretty gentle with him though. And, on special occasions, she might even let him touch her blanket or hand it to him for a few seconds.....If you know anything about Hadley, you know that is love!

As a newborn, Reid just had to go with flow and let Hadley do what she wanted. Now though, he's learned how to grab things which in some ways has been a big source of frustration for his big sister, who doesn't like it when he messes with a toy she's already claimed. And when that boy gets a hold of her pacifier or blanket when she hasn't offered it, shew! "No, Baby! No, Baby!" she tells him sternly with a scowl on her face. Reid, who has no clue that he's even done something to upset her, just keeps doing what's he's doing until Hadley snatches it back and then he usually just finds something new to grab a hold of. 

For a month or so, Reid's reaching/grabbing tendencies drove a bit of a wedge between these two, but now they seem to be back on good terms for the most part. Hadley's loosend up some and spends more time sitting beside him playing toys, even handing him things to help keep him content and occupied.

Something wonderful has taken place in the last several months between my two older children as well. Two individuals who had played mostly independently of each other for the first 18 months of Hadley's life, started to bond when Reid came into the picture, playing with each other rather than just beside each other.

To be honest, Hadley has always had a fascination with Caleb and wanted to be a part of his world, but often he was so engrossed in what he was playing with, that she mostly got ignored and as a result moved on to her own thing after a bit. In most cases, right after he would get out certain toys to play with and set everything up, here she'd come like a tornado knocking over everything in her path or trying to get her hands on what he had. (Of course it's more interesting if your big brother has it!)

Hadley wasn't the only one to blame though. Quite often she'd have a toy that he was interested in too, and Caleb would just grab it out of her hand, suggesting another toy she could play with instead. There were a few times when they would play together with the same toy, but for the most part it worked out best when they both went their own ways.

Now though, they are starting to look at each other as playmates rather than just competition for the toys. And, not much melts my heart any more than seeing them take each other by the hands to play together or watching them chase one another giggling down the hall or around the couch...These are the moments that are what having siblings is all about.

If Caleb is stomping around the house pretending to be a Tyrannosaurus Rex, you can expect to see Hadley trailing behind, high stepping to make sure her stomps are just as big as his. As a result, poor Hadley takes a lickin' as she tries to hang tough and keep up with a brother that is so much bigger than her. But, despite the bumps here and there, they are having a tremendous amount of fun.

Though some sharing struggles still exist as with all kids, there are so many things they play well together doing.

Sometimes wanting to follow big brother can get us in sticky situations though, since she's on the small side for some of the things he likes to enjoy. Little Priss doesn't want crayons if she sees Caleb with markers, which means we have to make sure she doesn't get to the walls. If he's into Play Doh, she needs some to squish through her hands too (and a little to taste, of course). And, if he's playing marbles, she's right there trying to sneak her way into his room before I scoop her up and haul her to safer territory where little pieces don't abound.

There's never a shortage of fun things she can safely find to do with him as they pal around together though. From hide and seek to sharing snacks and from playing kitchen to building blocks, they are busy buddies.

Caleb and Reid have their own sweet moments too. Three and a half years is still a lot of difference at this point in their lives, and Reid can't do a lot of what his big brother is interested in yet, but Caleb slows down and takes notice of this little chunkster pretty frequently. They don't really play together yet, but Caleb enjoys when Reid learns to do something new - like sit up by himself - and is excited to report it to me. If Reid is eating his sock or something needs something, big brother also often helps get Mommy or Daddy's attention.

Caleb is a big helper at times too, such as if I need someone to run grab a few wipes or new outfit for Baby Reid. One day he even tried his hand at diaper changing.

Other times, Caleb helps keep an eye on everyone if I have to run to the bathroom, walk in the other room for just a minute, or even if I am just looking the other direction; he's quick to let me know if something is amiss which I deeply appreciate. While some parents scold their kids for tattling, so far I haven't felt that way about his help. It's nice to have a second set of eyes and ears when there's so much to keep up with. He's turning into such a responsible young fella, and I'm pretty proud of him.

He's a proud big brother and likes to tell people "I named him 'Reid.'" (Truth be told, I guess he did.)

Not only has watching these little ones blessed me with joy, God has also used our kids and their relationship with one another to teach me so much about Himself. I never understood how desperately He must desire for us to love one another with patience, gentleness, and tenderness until I yearned for these three to care for each other in the same way.

Instead of just looking out for ourselves and going our own way, ignoring our spiritual brothers and sisters, He desires for us be involved in one another's lives. I'm sure His heart swells with pride when we stop to notice each other in need and interceded to our Father in prayer or lift a hand to help in a tangible way. 

There's not a much better gift a child can give their parent than to love their brothers and sisters. Maybe that's why God reminds us in verses like John 13:34 to love one another, because in doing so we bless the heart of our Creator.